Interviewing Italian Relatives: How to Record Family Stories

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Every Italian family has stories that never reached a document. Your nonna remembers the name of the street where she was born. Your uncle knows why the family left. When these relatives are gone, those details go with them. This guide shows you how to interview Italian relatives and record their family stories while you still can.

Why Family Stories Matter for Italian Ancestry

Records give you names, dates and places. Stories give you the reasons behind them. A civil record can tell you that your great-grandfather left in 1905. Only a relative can tell you that he left because the harvest failed and his brother had already gone ahead.

Stories also fill gaps that records leave open. Spellings changed. Families moved between villages. Nicknames replaced given names. A single remembered detail, such as the name of a parish or a neighbouring hill town, can send your research in the right direction.

Start with the living before you open an archive. Our guide to tracing your Italian ancestry puts this first for good reason. Relatives give you the names and places you need to search the records.

Before You Start: Plan the Conversation

A little planning makes the interview far richer. Spend an hour on these steps first.

Choose the right person and place

Talk to your oldest relatives first. Then talk to anyone who lived through key family events. Sit somewhere familiar to them. A kitchen table works better than a quiet office. Many Italian families tell their best stories over coffee or a meal.

Gather something to hold

Old photographs, a prayer card, a passport or a letter will all spark memories. Bring them along. Ask your relative to name the people in each photo. Write the names on a sheet of paper, not on the back of the photo.

Set up your recording

Your phone is enough. Ask permission before you record. Test the sound first. Keep the phone close, and turn off any background noise. Charge the battery. Then take handwritten notes too, in case the recording fails.

Questions That Bring Out the Best Stories

Short, open questions work best. Avoid questions that need only a yes or no. Let your relative talk, and let the silences stand. People often add their best detail after a pause.

Questions about the old country

• What was the name of the village or town, and which province was it in?
• What did your parents or grandparents do for work?
• What did the house look like? Who lived there?
• Which saint’s day did the village celebrate, and how?
• Which dishes did the family make for feast days?

Questions about the journey

• Who left first, and who followed?
• Why did they choose that destination?
• Which port did they leave from, and what do you remember about the voyage?
• Did anyone change their name or the spelling of it? The story behind that change is often a good one, as we explain in our article on surnames and Ellis Island.

Questions about everyday life

• What language did the family speak at home?
• Which sayings did your grandparents repeat?
• Which traditions did the family keep, and which did they drop?
• Who was the storyteller in the family?

Keep a list of dialect words and sayings as you go. Many families use words that differ from standard Italian. They can point to a specific region. Our guide to Italian sayings and proverbs may help you recognise a few.

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How to Capture Names, Places and Dates

Stories wander, and that is fine. Still, you need facts you can check later. Use a simple routine.

First, ask your relative to spell every name aloud. Write each one down exactly as they say it. Do not correct it yet. Italian records often use a different spelling from the one a family uses in its new country.

Second, ask for places in the original Italian. A relative might say “near Naples” when the real answer is a small comune in the hills. Press gently: “What was the nearest church called?” Parish names often lead you to the right records.

Third, ask how they know each detail. “My mother told me” and “I saw it myself” carry different weight. Note which is which. Later, compare each claim with documents such as the ones in our guide to reading Italian civil records.

A Story From the Hills of Basilicata

Here is how this can work in practice. Imagine a granddaughter in Ohio who sits down with her 91-year-old grandfather. He says only that his father came “from Basilicata”. She asks about the church. He remembers a feast for San Rocco in August, and a hill town where the men carried the statue through the streets.

That one detail gives her a saint, a month and a landscape. A few weeks later, he names the comune of Montalbano Jonico, in the province of Matera. She now knows which civil records to search. She looks for the family surname there and finds her great-grandfather’s birth entry. A single interview opened the door.

Your family’s story will differ. The method stays the same. Listen for the saint, the church, the neighbouring town and the trade. Each one is a search term.

After the Interview: Keep and Share What You Recorded

Save it the same day

Copy the recording to your computer and to a second place, such as cloud storage or an external drive. Name each file with the date and the person’s name. Write a short summary of what you heard while it is fresh.

Write up a transcript

You do not need to type every word. Note the key names, places and dates with the time they appear in the recording. A short index of the recording saves hours later.

Check the facts

Treat each claim as a lead, not as proof. Search for it in the records. Free online collections can help, and our guide to Italian genealogy on FamilySearch explains how to start. If your family settled abroad, our guides for Italian-Canadian and Italian-Australian researchers show where to look next. For the wider picture of who left and when, read about Italian emigration waves by region.

Share it with the family

Send a copy to your cousins. Ask them to add what they remember. Different relatives often recall different versions of the same event. Compare them, and note where they differ.

Take the Stories Home to Italy

The best use of a family story is to visit the place it describes. Walk the streets your relative named. Light a candle in the church they mentioned. Many travellers say the trip feels different when they carry a grandparent’s voice with them. For visits to cemeteries, our guide on finding Italian ancestors’ graves may help you prepare.

Your nonno left Italy. Now it’s time to go back.

You Might Also Enjoy

• Italian Surname Origins: What Your Family Name Reveals About Your Ancestry
• Italian Foundling Records: How to Trace an Ancestor Left at the Wheel
• Tracing Lost Italian Comuni: Finding Towns That Changed

Frequently Asked Questions

How do I start if my relatives do not want to be recorded?

Begin with a relaxed chat and take notes by hand. Many people agree to a recording once they see you are listening. Respect a “no”. Written notes still help you a great deal.

What if my relative does not remember the Italian village name?

Ask about nearby towns, the parish church, a saint’s day or the sea or mountains. Each clue narrows the search. Then check passenger and civil records for the exact comune.

How long should an interview last?

Aim for 45 to 90 minutes. Stop sooner if your relative looks tired. Plan a second session instead of pushing on.

Can I interview relatives who live far away?

Yes. Use a phone or video call and record it with their permission. Ask them to hold up photographs to the camera. Keep the same questions and the same note routine.

Should I correct my relative if I think they are wrong?

No. Let them finish. Note the claim and check it in the records afterwards. Memories often hold a true detail inside a muddled story.

Plan Your Italy Trip

Ready to visit the places your relatives described? Start with our ultimate Italy travel guide and build your heritage trip from there.

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